If you landed on this post, I suggest reading “Say Goodbye, Hear a Hello” first. I wrote that today on 12/30/16 with the silent re-launch of My Only Aim Blog. Then I checked my drafts and HELLO here it is, a prime example of feeling- Enjoy:
It was the sunset of the longest day of the year tonight as I drove home and I wanted to celebrate it, I wanted to lift a glass of Merlot up and cheers it– but my heart ached. Memories flooded me of what life was like before the move. The late nights, showing off a town I knew, ordering coffee with a barista who knew me, the couch that enveloped me with warmth and love. The friendships there that shielded me from the cold and harshness of bearing ones soul. The struggle, it was real, (hah) working through our twenties, figuring out what was truly the essence of youth and how to lean in to the Lord when our hearts were screaming to us all sorts of other desires.
And I know there is more, I am expectant, I don’t plan to ache for long. But it was a time so precious and so near to me that when I feel it– it feels like a real loss. Like I had and now it is so obvious that I have not. But we know, we know, the Lord planned all of this. Nothing else really makes sense.